7 at La Cigale

Are you Lebanese? Do you like terrible house music, skeezy dudes, and slutty dresses? If the answer is yes then 7 is probably your favourite club in town.

Seriously, that’s all I’ve got to offer. I mean, I could write about the layout of the room (it’s a long rectangle), the crowded dancefloor (where you can make out with strangers), or the private tables (where you can sit back and judge other people), but I think that opening paragraph says all you need to know about 7.

Basically, it’s the sort of place you either love or hate. I guess the only thing you have to keep in mind is that you #HaveToBeDrunk when you go in there. And not, “Oh, I had a drink or two and am feeling good,” kinda tipsy. I mean, tequila shots + wine + scotch and I might call in sick at work tomorrow drunk.

Attempting to navigate the clusterfuck of people that make up the crowd while halfway sober will make you loose all faith in humanity… and then you’ll blow a small fortune knocking back shots just to deal with the ugliness.

On the plus side, if you like skeezy girls in short dresses then this is the spot. Alternatively, if dubious men with too much money and questionable attitudes towards women do it for you then you’ll also appreciate 7. For everyone else this is some Joseph Conrad, heart of Darkness type isht… “The horror, the horror…”

You can find more tips on living and working in Qatar in my book — God Willing: How to survive expat life in Qatar.